I think a common struggle for us who walk with the Lord is having to know the “why” or knowledge of the outcome of what we are doing now and how it all fits into God’s wonderful plan for our lives and the lives of others. Personally, I like to know what it is I am stepping into so I can create an action plan and move forward confidently. The Lord has been patient with me. He teaches me time after time, that His ways are higher than our ways and He has this. Six months ago, I began a job in consulting that did not make sense on paper. Accepting this job would require long hours and an uncertain amount of travel. At the time, my son Noah was 18 months old and we had yet to be apart for more than a day - this was going to be heartbreaking for me and burdensome for my husband. Months and months of prayer leading up my start date led to an act of faith and obedience to God. Therefore, in July of 2018, I began a two-week training in Chicago, which was heart wrenching and eye opening at the same time.
Three days into training, I met my assigned career coach, Carrie, who happened to be teaching a few training sessions over the two-week training period. To be better acquainted and discuss goals, we agreed to meet for dinner the following week. That night I reached out to a few friends for prayer. I was missing Noah immensely and feeling serious mommy guilt. The next morning, I woke up and felt the Lord shifting my focus and telling my heart to trust Him and love on these fellow colleagues in training because they needed hope. Although my heart was sad, my focus shifted off myself to God’s mission for me during this training. Not surprisingly, the Lord led me to have good conversations that share the hope of Jesus that week and ones that have continued with colleagues.
The following week, still struggling with a sad heart, I went to dinner with my career coach, Carrie. During dinner, I jumped into “professional mode” to discuss my background, thoughts and desires over my new role. On our walk back to the hotel, we chatted about our families, fitness routines, and work philosophies etc... As we entered the hotel lobby, we began to wrap up and Carrie placed her hand on my shoulder and sweetly stated to me, “There are a few other strong Christians who work here, I will introduce you; I am their coach also.” A huge sigh of relief washed over me and we have spoken candidly ever since. Heading back to my hotel room, I felt a renewed sense of hope and purpose; God was with me and I was stepping forward into His laid plans. Clearly, like Psalm 46:10, God goes before us and we only have to be still - He will be glorified.
Looking back over the past six months, I have developed great working relationships and friendships with a small group of amazing, like-minded Jesus followers. Having a coach and mentor that is a Christian has equated to freely discussing our hearts for Christ as it pertains to workplace and family. However, the flip side of this job has been a ton of travel, long hours, and extra burden for my family.
Nevertheless, through being still, trusting God, and obediently walking through an ambiguous time (although emotionally taxing and filled with moments of spiritual warfare), the Lord has been glorified and my faith has been strengthened.
Most recently, my work has granted me the opportunity to begin part-time consulting work starting mid-January 2019. So many times, I have encouraged those I love with Exodus 14:14, and it felt so beautiful and personal to see how God arranged this for my family and me. I am also reminded of Proverbs 3:5-6 that compels us to trust in God lean not on our own understanding (or what looks good on paper), acknowledge Him, and He will make our paths straight. I am thankful that God placed me in this season of life . An image that comes to mind is of a child learning how to ride a bike with “training wheels.” For this time around it was to get into the practice of “being still” which has resulted in an increase in faith, steadfastness in darkness, and trust in uncertainty. God is good and can be trusted to deliver His glory- even in tough circumstances, uncertainty and the unknown. He is always working.